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I was sitting in class. I was still as I waited for the teacher so arrive so I can get over and done with this school. My class as usual were animals because they ran around the class as if there was a murderer chasing them around, but I usually just ignore them and scribble on my notebook. But this time was different. In class there was a boy with kind eyes and looked at me like I had just embarrassed myself as usual, but I looked at him back and he sat right beside me in the empty desk. I felt the world go in slow- motion, but I felt my world come together.

The teacher walked in and she introduced the new boy in class.

"So we have a new student today and his name is Brendon who just moved here from Toronto and he lives here in Edmonton now so welcome."

He smiled with his kind eyes looking at me and my heart pounds like lightning. RING RING.

Lunch times comes around and I walk to my usual table alone, but Brendon comes around he sits right beside me.

"Uh hi..." He greets.

"Hey." I respond.

"Is this school nice to be in?" He asks.

"Asking the wrong person" I manage to choke out.

"Ask the popular kids cause I never really talk to people" I explain.

"Well I don't want too" he says.

"Can we hang out after school please?" He asked.

"Okay I guess" I say trying to not to sound like i'm not interested.

I was actually jumping for joy inside of me. RING RING. After school ended it was time to meet Brendon. My heart pounded and my hands were sweating I was standing waiting for him to come out. After about 5 minutes waiting he actually came to me and greeted me but the worst thing happened. The popular people saw us talking to each other and they started making fun of us, I started to tear up and I ran away. I went home and I just jumped on my bed feeling like I didn't want to live again.

The next day comes so slow but I had to go to school and face Brendon. He saw me but he didn't even talk to me. He didn't say hi or wave. During lunch he did sit beside me but we didn't talk, so I wrote a not saying: Look I am sorry for running away yesterday but I saw the popular kids making fun of us but couldn't handle it so I ran, but i hope we can be friends - Emily. I gave it to him and left.

The next day he did talk to me and he smiled but i knew we could never be together. I tried my best to forget about him but i knew we couldn't be together because I never want to go through heartbreak ever again. I knew though we could be friends. Every time I saw him though I died inside. We did talk here and then but I liked him so much but he didn't like me and if people said he liked me I never believed it. If I had a quarter for every time I had feelings of love, hate and hatred I would only have one because it never stopped.

Three Years Later...

I'm in Grade 9 now. I remember how I loved Brendon in Grade 6 and I never even stopped, I kept reminding myself that I have to get over him but I couldn't. Me and him stayed in the same school since and we never really talked as much since our first encounter but things have been looking up because I have friends and their names are Summer, Lily and Jaycee. We met in Grade 7 and we have been best friends since, I have told them about Brendon and they do bug me about it but I always put him aside. People have told me that Brendon likes me but I never cared but when I got home I would cry on my pillows because of how heartbroken I am.

I do have his number but when I text him he wouldn't even answer. I texted Jaycee about this problem and she said things like: Oh wow, he doesn't deserve you Emily just give him up or he doesn't even use his fingers to text hi. I even told the rest of my friends and they all said the same thing which is: It's okay. It feels like he didn't even exist, he ghosted me pretty much but he didn't really ghost me. He looks at me but he doesn't say hi. I feel lost and I feel really depressed and it doesn't help when my family is going through a divorce but I try to block out everything, everything but my friends and maybe my family.

Today at school everyone told me that Brendon is calling me his girlfriend even at lunch. So I texted him after school seeing if he'll respond. He surprisingly did for once in his life.

Brendon:

Well I wanted to ask if we could try dating since we have been friends for a while.

Emily:

Well I have liked you for a while.

Brendon:

Me too.

We were in a full on conversation for once and we texted each other till it was time to go to bed. But I had to hide the fact that I was texting him from my parents, they were both very strict and I wasn't allowed to date until I was done school. We texted each other everyday after school but I always had to start the conversation. I texted Jaycee about this problem.

Emily:

I am upset about you know who...

Jaycee:

Well just ignore him then and you shouldn't be the one doing all the work here.

Basically she told me to ignore him. That was super hard to do and I even told Summer about this in Math, she told me to text him after school if he hates me. So I did after school.

Emily:

Do you hate me? Just be honest.

Brendon:

No people bother me so much about you and we don't hang out much.

Emily:

I know

Brendon:

Maybe we should save dating till we are in the same class...

Emily:

I might not be here next year...

I lied. I am coming next year, I wanted to see how he reacts. Everyday now at school he would just look at me and I couldn't stand him every time I see him and I will die. This girl who goes on my bus named Jenna helps me with my problems with him since she is in the same class with him. We are going to an amusement park for a field trip next week and she told me she convinced him to go on a ride with me, before I was so excited but now I don't want to anymore. I just wanted to cry and cry but I am just dealing with the fact he hates me.

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